I'm A Deep Thinker....In My Dreams!

It's actually true.

Lately I've been feeling like my life has no real purpose, like I don't have a destination to reach.
I live my life day in and day out. Period.
There is no purpose what so ever.

But wait there must be a purpose;
I go to school!
Yes that has a purpose, but I need something to live for now not three years down the road
I work at Banner's.
You think; that's easy, the purpose is to make money!
I say what a crappy purpose.
I work at UP.
But am I really making a difference?

I've actually had this feeling a while back, but that's a whole other story that I would rather not get into.

Don't worry, this entry isn't all depressing, like any good twentieth century fox movie, I come to a realization.

But oh wait, this isn't just a normal twentieth century fox film.
This film has me in it so I couldn't possibly come to this realization in a normal way.

It had to come to me in a dream.

Some say that dreams are the brains way of processing what happens in our day to day lives, after this dream I'm starting to believe it that this fact is true.

Now I don't actually remember what the dream was, but for the readers sake, let us pretend I was excepting the Nobel Peace prize in my underwear.

I just remember waking up and having these words floating around in my head so I grabbed a piece of paper and started writing, this is what I got down;

"Everyday is the same.
I pray for crazy and all I get is normality.
I feel like I'm living the same day over and over again.
Mind you, these days have their slight differences,
but when you take out the dialog, these days are identical.
I guess dialog and our personal connections with people is what makes each day unique.
Without these personal connections we would have no reason to feel anything.
Pain, Happiness, Love, Joy, Sadness, Empathy,
Without these emotions we are dead,
and if we are dead what's the purpose in living?"

I don't even know if it makes sense too you, but it does to me. =p

So even if the purpose is hidden, we all have a purpose.

To make a personal connection with the other people in this world
Whether it be you being;
- a friend
- someone to talk to
- a listening ear to a kid who has something to say
- a friendly smile to a stranger
- someone who makes people laugh

In whatever way you choose to show it, you need to show it because if we all strive for this purpose, I'm almost sure the world would be a better place.

That's my thought of the night, sorry if it was a little preachy, I'm sure it was.

AND i would really appreciate you telling me what you thought about it

thanks for reading, I hope your brain doesn't hurt like mine does. :D

I Have A Confession; I'm Dating Your Mom...

lol just kidding, but I did get your attention...

but phew! I'm glad that isn't true cause that would just make things awkward between us :P

anyways, got back from school retreat, yes it was friggin' awesome.
it was at Malibu camps and just everything was awesome!
The food, the cabin's, the people, the games...
oh and the pacific ocean = very cold

i also learned that musical chairs with the chair replaced with boys is so hilarious!!
i don't think Jung Ming will ever be the same after being the last chair

i also learned that there are still decent people in this world, you know who you are, props! lol

but the whole reason i am writing this blog is for a song...yes a song
i actually love this song
I'm teaching myself to play it on guitar, it actually only four chords lol

El Scorcho originally by weezer but redone by Dashboard Confessional
the lyrics are just so good

Goddamn you half-Japanese girls
Do it to me every time
Oh, the redhead said you shred the Cello
And I'm jello, baby
But you won't talk, won't look, won't think of me
I'm the epitome of public enemy
Why you wanna go and do me like that?
Come down on the street and dance with me

I'm a lot like you so please, hello, I'm here, I'm waiting
I think I'd be good for you and you'd be good for me

I asked you to go to the Green Day concert
You said you never heard of them (how cool is that)How cool is that?
So I went to your room and read your diary:
Watching Grunge leg drop New-Jack through a presstable...
And then my heart stopped:Listening to Cio-Cio San,
fall in love all over again.

I'm a lot like you so please, hello, I'm here, I'm waiting
I think I'd be good for you and you'd be good for me

How stupid is it?
I can't talk about it
I gotta sing about it and make a record of my heart
How stupid is it? Won't you gimme a minute
Just come up to me
And say hello to my heart
How stupid is it? For all I know you want me too
And maybe you just don't know what to do
Or maybe you're scared to say: 'I'm falling for you'

I wish I could get my head out of the sand
Cause I think we'd make a good team
And you would keep my fingernails clean
But that's just a stupid dream that I won't realize
Cause I can't even look in your eyes without shaking, and I ain't faking
I'll bring home the turkey if you bring home the bacon

I'm a lot like you so please, hello, I'm here, I'm waiting
I think I'd be good for you and you'd be good for me
I'm a lot like you
I'm a lot like you
I'm a lot like you
And I'm waiting
I think I'd be good for you and you'd be good for me

Well Here It Is...

As promised, a blog about my new job.

I am the new waitress of your local family friendly Banner's Restaurant!

Don't pee yourself, it's not that exciting.

I love working there, everyone is so nice and old! It' like having a million grandparents, dead serious [no pun intended]. They like ask me my name and I know theirs, it's so awesome!

Oh but wait, it's not always just sweet old men...there's also the sweet, good looking men ;)
I mean my dreams came true the other day; 6 Irish men, and one waitress [that waitress being me]. They were so nice, and they gave me a huge tip :)

What else, is there....hmmmm
Oh yeah there was this one older gentleman who pretended to have a heart attack on my second day!!

Like holy crap, I nearly had one.
I come up to him and I ask "how was everything?, would you like some more coffee?"
[I line I use on all the men ;) it's doesn't seem to work tho]
And he's like "yeah, everything is good but....." then he proceeds to pretend he is having a heart attack!
Who would do this to me on my second day!!
Actually it was quite funny, but still.... he took like 5 years off my life.
He's like my favorite customer.
The other day he asked me for a stack of 100$ bills and a new car...He's so cool...

I also broke my first glass today, it was quite funny.

I was taking out a glass to fill with water and I underestimated how high the counter was and smashed the glass straight into the counter, it's was quite funny.

The best part is, no one knows it happened....just me :D

Anyways, this was one of the more boring entries, sorry for the dryness :)

Also, sudoku is harder with your eyes closed, go figure!

I Lied

My blog is only the second biggest waste of time
This is the first...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nhizo7KrZrw&feature=related

If it doesn't work just type in McRoll'd

It speaks for itself

To My Fans...a.k.a. Ryan and Maybe Debs

Hello everyone!

I must apologize, I have not been faithful.
I have not been faithful to you and this blog.
And as Ryan so kindly pointed out, it's really hard to stalk someone who hasn't updated their blog in about a million years.
So I would also like to apologize to my stalker(s) as well.

So from here on out, I am going to try to write in my blog at least one time every two weeks.

However, I'm not going to make any promises cause we all know that I probably won't be able to commit to the above statement.

So if you are my stalker or have nothing better to do then read my blog [If you have nothing better to do then read my blog you must live a very boring and uneventful life, on the other hand I must live a very boring and uneventful life to be writing it[this is a long insert]] Then do something useful while you're waiting for my next blog entry.

Like solve this problem for me;

The statement below is false.
The statement above is true.

Seriously it's a toughy.

But have no fear, there will be a blog entry telling you all about my new job. What is my new job, you ask? You'll have to wait till my next blog entry, but first, is sudoku harder to do with your eyes closed? The answer and more coming up after a word from our sponsors.

It Wasn't As Easy As I Thought It Would Be To Find A Computer

So yeah instead of writing in my blog while I was gone, i wrote in my journal.
I'm just gunna post a new entry everyday.
Here is Day 1

Day 1

Holy Crap, I'll be happy if I never see another plane ever again.
Me and Romdoul were a little to excited to sleep so we decided to play a prank on Jenn, who was sleeping. We set all the clocks in my room all ahead to 4:19 so the alarm would ring and she would get up and start getting ready. So all was going well until me and Romdoul couldn't stop laughing. Oh well, so we wake up on at the real time and head over to the church to meet up with others and we take a little ride over to the airport, where we had a Timmy Hoe's breakfast. Then we flew to Texas. Guess what movie played on the plane?
That right, Horton Hears a Who.

So funny.

In Texas, we walked around the airport mall for about two and a half hours. This airport is huge, a lot of moving sidewalk things, but that’s another story. We all bought a shirt that said “don’t mess with Texas”. I really wanted to get the “everything is bigger in Texas” shirt but to my great surprise, they were nowhere to be found, which I find quite un heard of. So our next flight was to Philly which was only 3 and a half hour.

Oh by the way Philadelphia isn’t a state, it’s a city.
Yeah I know, I couldn’t believe it either.

So, when we get to Philly, we get a shuttle to Hertz. To our surprise we got the king of all SUV’s. It was a 2008 Ford exbiditionloration, something or other. Basically it was a monster. We are also pretty sure it was going to be broken into in Camden. So we get in our little supped up beast and head down to our home away from home.

Rutgers University of Camden.

So me, Jenn, and Romdoul all are sleeping in one room. The dorm was quite nice, there were two bunk beds and one single bed on a normal bed frame, and of coarse no one wanted to sleep on the bunk beds because there was no ladder and these bed were like 6 feet off the ground. And when girls sleep in one room they feel this need to sleep relatively close to each other.

Get your mind out of the gutter; it isn’t that kind of story.

So we decide to all sleep on the one single which worked really well till we realized that we would move while we slept so we made Jenn go to the end of the bed. So we were all happy and we went to sleep. I woke up a little while later to realize that Jenn was no longer at the bottom of the bed. So I do what any person would do, look at the end of the bed to see if she has fallen off. Too my surprise she isn’t there. I look to my left, and she is sleeping on the floor! Lying on her stomach, with her head propped up with her hands. It was almost as if she fell asleep glaring at us.

Creepy.

So I did what any other good friend would do,
I went back to sleep.

IM LEAVING...!!

AND NEVER COMING BACK!

just kidding...

Well, Its almost ten so I'm going to be leaving in 6 hours, 45 mins. If you do the math, you will figure out that I am leaving at 4 45.

I am not that excited now, but every couple of hours I'm like freaking out excited!
We had a meeting today to get the run down of things.
We are meeting in front of the church at 4 45am and our flight is at 7 45am
The flight is like 13 hours with a two hour delay in TEXAS!!! I'm so excited to go to Texas!
They we fly to Philly and get in at night.
We are sleeping at a University
The next morning we are going to church and buying food for meals.
Then we have to go to an orientation where we will learn a bunch of stuff that we probably already know about, cause we have all worked at UP for forever.

So that's the rundown of the next two days of my life.
I have computer access down there so I'll keep you guys posted!

Leave me comments!!!

Miss you all;
Jess