It's Been A While My Old Friend...

...so don't expect any miracles

Any hooo

I have caught the dreaded flu.
For the past three days I have been omnipresently observing you all from Facebook

and don't look at me like I'm the scum of the earth, you all do it too!
You can only change your profile pic so many times until you start to look vain or change your status so many times from "I'm sick" to "ughh" to "stupid flu" till YOU even get annoyed by yourself. Then you say okay let's see what Ryan has been doing...so you surf over to his page and find out he has some homework to do, oh Ryan, by the way, how's the knee?

Okay Ryan, that was for effect, not to creep you out, okay super friend?

Anyways, this starts a vicious cycle where you click on someone else page, you all know under the little tab "friends you have in common"
You end up going to endless peoples pages learning that Debs really likes Slumdog Millionaire and that Jon Wong can't find his cell phone, then it hits me;

HOLY CRAP, Facebook is taking the purpose, drive, and meaning away from all stalkers!

These poor guys who devote their lives to waking up really early and waiting in the bushes outside your house every morning hoping they'll catch a glimpse of you.
BUT NOOO not anymore, the people being stalked have taken the thrill out of it.
You might as well have caught them in your bushes and said
"hey you're wasting your time, I have 2.000 pics on Facebook you can eat your sandwich in front of, or whatever you do with my pictures"

Here is a totally unture phone conversation I didn't actually over hear

Dude: Hey man what you doing today?
Stalker: Dude you always ask this, I'm stalking Amara, remember it's what I do everyday
Dude: Dude, haven't you heard of Facebook, people update their status' and upload pics, the people you stalk do the work for you! You just have to sit at your computer and watch the live feed.
Stalker: *silence*
Dude: Hey, you there man?
Stalker: *Whimpers and lets out a small sob*
Dude: Are you crying?
Stalker: No...I'm just cutting onions
Dude:.....You don't cook
Stalker: SO WHAT IF I"M CRYING... can't a man cry when his life has lost all purpose? You have no feelings, I thought you'd be there for me no matter what!
*click*

Yes, stalker may have over reacted and is a it of a pussy, and yes Dude may be a little insensitive, but that's not the point.

The point is the stalkers we know and love are loosing their purpose.

And I am the first to admit that I am also guilty of the crime against stalkers. That's why I'm proposing a day, in honour of all stalkers. A day that we all disable our Facebook pages, so the stalkers of the world can get back to what they do best.

Follow us with cameras and invade our privacy

Let me just check my date book here, hmm
tmr?...no that's anti-bullying day,
How about the 27th, no according to http://library.thinkquest.org/2886/feb.htm that's international polar bear day
Okay I propose that February 29th be help a Stalker day!


Lets do it for the stalkers.